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4 Great ways Dads are different

Dec 27, 2019 Posted by: Jemelee Arcibal
4 Great ways Dads are different

There is no denying that there are differences between how moms and dads parent their kids. Just because dads may do things differently than moms doesn’t mean their parenting style is less beneficial to kids. A different perspective on how to handle challenges, how to have fun, and how to show affection is great for kids. Here are some great ways dads are different.

Dads play differently

When I watch my husband interact with our kids, I notice one major difference, how they play together. My husband will often hide and when the kids start looking for him, he will jump out and scare them. He fills water balloons for an hour to have a water fight that lasts five minutes. He spends time building Legos and helping the kids learn how to follow the instructions. He wrestles with, laughs with, and good-naturedly teases the kids. They love it. Most of these things I would rarely do, some I would avoid if possible. Dads have a way of bringing silliness and fun into our kids lives, usually in the form of a game. The kids love it, the dads love it, and it strengthens the bond between them.

Dads are more flexible

This may not apply to all dads but many are a little more flexible than moms. When I was a little girl my mom had a weekly night out with her friends and my dad was in charge. This often meant fried egg and ketchup sandwiches and staying up late watching TV. I remember one day dad let us have ice cream for dinner. We walked to the ice cream shop and my brother and I ordered bubble gum ice cream cones. By the time we had walked home, we were covered in a sticky mess. Instead of a bath dad sprayed us down with a hose, took us inside and changed us right into our pajamas and called it a night. We all laughed the whole time, including my dad, and I remember thinking how mom would never have allowed that. The next night we went back to our normal routine but those little moments of silliness and flexibility taught me that sometimes it’s okay to set aside the rules and routine and have fun.

Dads show affection differently

Kids enjoy snuggling up with both mom and dad but in addition to sitting together reading a book or watching a movie, dads have a way of showing affection that is different from mom. They wrestle, tickle, and roughhouse. They lift kids up on their shoulders and carry them around and often spend time roughhousing and showing affection in a totally different way than women typically do. They carry kids to their beds and throw them onto a pile of pillows, which is usually rewarded with giggles and a shout of “Do it again!”. Dads have a knack for showing affection and having fun at the same time. 

Dads encourage kids to try new things

I love how my husband encourages the kids to try new things. It is usually easier for me to just order food for the kids when we are at a restaurant but my husband lets them speak to the waitress themselves and order their own food. This teaches them independence and how to be comfortable speaking to other adults. If they are too shy to do so, he pushes them out of their comfort zone and tells them they can do it, gently encouraging them to try something new. There are so many situations like this. Dads often will push kids to try new things, learn to do things themselves, or tell them to follow the directions on their own.

There may be difference between how moms and dads parent their kids but neither is right or wrong. Each parent has something unique to teach their kids and different ways of showing love.

 

source: Sarah Lyons

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

Dec 26, 2019 Posted by: Jemelee Arcibal

It is quite possible to save a significant amount of money while you’re young. A Reddit user asked the question: “People under 30 who’ve already managed to save 100k, how did you do it?” and he received thousands of responses. Some people honestly admitted that they were lucky to be born in a rich family that helped them, but many people saved this amount completely on their own.

Bright Side chose the most popular tips and made a list. We don’t think that everyone can save this much money, but we are completely sure that anyone can save enough for an epic vacation.

1. Live with your parents.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

  • I lived at home with my parents. Lived in the suburbs and not in a place with many young people, so I rarely went out. This is where most of my savings came from. People don’t seem to realize how much you save by living with your parents. I saved at least $1200/month from rent alone during the first few years out of college. Add on utility and other bills and that’s another few hundred. I built connections and was promoted to a manager level position within 3 years. I now make $120k, but have since moved out and into my own place. © Joe-misidd

2. Make automatic transfers to a savings account the day you get your paycheck.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

  • I’m in my early 30s now, but I had over $100,000 in the bank before I was 30. Automatic transfers to my savings accounts and mutual funds as soon as I found my job— you can’t miss it if you never see it!! © Lewd_Topiary

3. Don't rush to buy a car, especially an expensive one.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

The president of France Emmanuel Macron and ex-Prime Minister of Denmark Lars Rasmussen on bicycles

Most people really don't need anything more than public transportation and a bicycle, a car is just a symbol of success and nothing more. But in the case that a person doesn't have a good financial cushion, they can't think they are successful just because they have a car. In the Netherlands, for example, 36% of people prefer riding bicycles and the number of these people is growing.

  • Commute to work on public transit. Most office jobs will pay or reimburse you for a transit pass. © aderptoremember
  • Ride your bike. Save on gas and car wear. © SmashBusters

4. Don't buy brand name things.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

In the modern world, it is a little funny to buy brand name things. According to statistics, the number of people who borrow money from banks is constantly growing. Many of them buy trendy gadgets and cars and then they have nothing to eat. They can't save enough money if they keep spending crazy amounts of money on things they don't truly need.

  • Basically, I don’t spend a lot of money on trivial stuff. I’m not into fashion or chasing electronic trends, when I need or want something I buy it for the hardware and quality, rather than the brand name. I didn’t have a car until I was 27 because I didn’t need one, public transportation worked very well for me. © Zerole00

5. Don't use the phrase "I can afford this."

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

 

Excessive consumption is one of the biggest vices of modern society. Even if a person earns enough money, the habit of buying anything this person wants leads to the inability to save a significant amount of money. Some people want to buy things that are not necessary but unique, and there is even a term for this phenomenon — snob effect.

  • There are a lot of what I would call “poor rich” people. For example, my best friend. By all means, we had the exact same start — graduated college debt-free, got an old car from our parents, and landed well-paying jobs in the LA area. She and her husband make $135-145k jointly per year. My husband and I make $105k jointly per year. She is constantly broke and overdrafting her accounts, while my husband and I have $150,000 saved up. We’re 27. The primary issue comes down to daily spending habits. They eat out, they go to restaurants, they buy new devices... It’s easy to spend more than you earn if you can’t limit yourself. © emmaballoo

6. Buy property.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

The property, unless it's a mortgage, pays itself off pretty quickly and it doesn't matter if you live in it or if you rent it. The cost of property usually grows together with inflation - much faster than inflation in developing cities.

  • I invested in real estate. Worked the night shift at McDonald’s until I could afford a $40k house. Spent my nights at McD and my days fixing the house. 8 years later, that house is now worth $140k. Last year, I pulled $60k in equity out of the house and bought another, this one for $195k. I now have renters in the first house paying me $1,100/month. © Rust_Dawg

7. Change your specialty or workplace.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

  • $120k in our bank account, we are 24 years old. I started as a wedding photographer and then I organized my own online courses. It turned out that teaching people to take photos is much more profitable. But my wife and I have a pretty simple life, we don’t have fancy clothes or a cool car. © saltwatersaguaro

8. Learn to cook.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

  • I won’t say I never get a drink at a restaurant, but I rarely do. It just adds dollars to the bill... And this adds up if you do it a lot. Instead, we spend $25 on mixers/vodka and make drinks at home for like 2 nights... It’d cost $100+ to do that in a restaurant. Cook at home, don’t give in to the temptation of going out to eat on a regular basis. It matters a lot for someone making ~$35k/year. When you’re making $350k, then you can ignore these expenses. © ACreativeTechnophile

9. Don't look for easy money.

9 Simple but Effective Budgeting Methods That Helped People Save $100,000

  • Got an inheritance of about $1.2 million, joined the stock market and now have $100k. © unknown author

But before, decide what you want from your youth. Living with your parents, using public transportation, being careful about every purchase you make? A happy youth or investments in the future should be everyone's personal choice.

  • I get the point you’re making, and good on you for saving well and being so disciplined, but I can’t really fault your friends either. Yes, they are spending more than they need to, but they’re also enjoying their lives and seem fairly well set up to maintain their lifestyle. Assuming they have income protection in case their circumstances change, I can’t really fault them either. Money is a tool and if that tool can be used for pleasure without harming your future too much, then that seems fine too. Can’t fit much cash in your grave after all. © Deepandabear

 

source: BrightSide

This is how to make the most out of a short parent-teacher conference, Mama

Dec 25, 2019 Posted by: Jemelee Arcibal kids,  Mindset,  new moms,  parent,  parenting
This is how to make the most out of a short parent-teacher conference, Mama

For the first time, I sat on the other side of the conference table. My 4-year-old daughter's teacher apologized for placing her cell phone visibly on the table as it started counting down. 11:59, 11:58, 11:57. She was trying desperately to stick to an almost impossible schedule.

I had 12 minutes to hear everything about my daughter's classroom experience—her academic performance, behavior, frustrations, challenges, goals, as well as flip through a binder of her work that probably took her teacher way more than 12 minutes to prepare.

As a special education teacher, I have conducted many parent-teacher conferences, so I'm very familiar with one-on-one time with parents. After almost nine years, I've figured out how to get the best out of this short period of time.

The most important thing to remember during a parent-teacher conference is NOT to feel timed—which is hard to do with a clock counting down before your eyes and the buzzing of parents gathering by the door waiting for their turn. But even though you only have a few minutes, this should not be the only chance to communicate with teachers. If it feels like is, the conference is a great time to fix that.

Here are five ways to get the most out of a parent-teacher conference:

1. Be a good listener.

In most cases, the teacher should have prepared some information to share with you. It's okay to just listen and not feel pressured to interrupt with questions. If you decide to share anecdotes, make sure they are short and to the point—don't waste time on frivolous topics.

2. Come prepared with at least three questions.

You may have specific questions already. If not, consider asking questions about how your child interacts or plays with her peers or how they participate in classroom activities. Some examples:

  • Does he ask questions or wait to be called on?
  • Does she transition well between activities?
  • Does he have difficulty working independently?
Often children behave differently at home and at school, and these questions will prompt the teacher to speak in more detail about their behavior in the classroom and on the playground. One of my favorite questions is: "How can I support my child at home?" This gives teachers an opportunity to talk about academic or social areas in which your child would benefit from help or reinforcement. It will also let the teacher see that you are a team player and want to work with your child to help them succeed.

3. Ask to review your child's work after the conference is over.

It's a good idea to take their work into the hallway so the next parent can start their conference. That way you can take your time looking at the work and it doesn't take away from your 12 minutes.

4. Create a plan at your conference.

Depending on your child's goals, you can make a plan at the conference of how you can help your child at home. For example, if your child is having difficulty using scissors, the teacher may have suggestions for activities you can do together at home or materials you should have access to around the house. If you'd like to communicate more regularly with the teacher, you can decide together the best way to consistently share helpful information. The teacher may offer to create a weekly progress report or a special notebook that both of you write in daily. Whatever your plan is, you should leave the conference with a clear understanding of your role and responsibility as well as the teacher's in making it work.

5. Set up a follow-up meeting.

Teachers understand that 12 minutes twice a year is not enough time to discuss all of your concerns. You may need to set up an additional meeting to continue the conversation or to re-evaluate the plan you've put in place. This can often be done over the phone or at a time more convenient than the scheduled conferences.

 

source: mother.ly